I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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