When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. ~Tom Wilson
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. ~Jean Paul Richter
Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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